I m Sending You An Email And Guess What..

Some people I know have recently been provided with smart phones, and needless to say, these folks are now sending emails from their phones to everybody. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with it. That's in fact a smart move. Send emails while watching tv, playing with your kids, driving..it's all good.

But here's the problem - they either do not want to type a lot on that tiny keyboard, or they have just become goddamn lazy (and rude), because what they do is they type the actual message in the subject of that email, and leave the body blank. Now when I read the subject line of that email on my phone or computer I obviously open it, thinking that there would be details in the goddamn body of that email. But guess what, I am always surprised because there is no goddamn text in that email. It's freaking blank!

That pisses me off. Why? I will tell you why.

Because 1), it wastes my time and energy. Reading the subject first and then opening the email (anticipating a detailed message) only to find out that there is nothing else being mentioned is an insult to my efforts. When I put some energy trying to get more information from an email, I expect to be rewarded. If you want to send one line messages to everybody, send us all a freaking text message on our phones. If you are too lazy to do that then at least mention "end of message", "that's it", or "over and out" (or whatever) at the end of the message in the subject line.

2) I just think it's rude. An electronic message is made of a number of parts (To, subject, body etc.) and I feel that each component of an email should be respected by providing content that it's meant to accept. If you are sending me just a file via email and I know that you are going to do that, then it's okay. Send me an email with an attachment and an empty body. Go crazy, I don't mind. But sending the message in the subject line is like disrespecting the "Body" part of that email. It's like snatching a toy from your kid and giving it to your dog. The kid doesn't deserve that treatment (I am okay with you snatching the toy from your dog and giving it to your kid though). And like I mentioned earlier, it's just rude to send an email without text in the actual goddamn body.

Lately I have been noticing a pattern. I can spot the email that would have an empty body instantly, and the first thing I do is cuss. I call the sender an asshole.

There. I am done bitching, and I feel good now.

I Am A Football Expert Because I Update My Facebook Status Every 10 Seconds

There's one aspect of smart phones that I am not really liking these days, and that aspect is the Facebook app. Now don't get me wrong. I spend most of my time holding my phone or my iPod Touch and checking out Facebook updates. However, there is something that is kind of annoying me, and it will stop on the 11th of this month for sure (I hope).

We all love football, and the last three weeks or so have been extra special because of the World Cup. Now this is where my problem starts. It goes without saying that everybody (including the ones who have never played football passionately but have watched the Lipstick League on cable every year) is an "armchair expert" of this game. I don't mind that. We all have opinions, and we all make judgments. Nothing wrong with that. What is wrong is that all of those so called experts are updating their Facebook statuses every 10 minutes on their phones. 

"OMG! OMG!"

"Handball!"

"That was not a fair yellow"

"$&^k the referee"

..and the list goes on.

I know that there was a goal. I know somebody got a red card, and I freaking know that the referees are not doing a good job. What I don't know is why you all cannot just quietly watch the game and keep your excitement and emotions to yourself or the people around you? 

Being a Facebook junkie, I keep checking my Facebook all the time, and all I see are these insane statuses - every 5 - 10 minutes. The biggest mistake I make is when I comment on somebody's status (or even just Like it for that matter). I keep notification emails about the fifteen of my friend's friends who just commented on his status right after mine. The phone keeps beeping and when I check my email, all I see is "Asshole # 1 commented on your Assholic friend's status", "Asshole # 2 commented on the same Assholic friend's status", and so on.

I don't mind post match comments, but commenting every 5 minutes while the game is still in progress? Don't you understand that nobody gives a chhit about your updates? And also, don't you know that those updates are awfully annoying (yes they are, if you said no to that question)?

I know nobody cares about the emotional trauma I go through when I read those updates, but please, for the love of God, let me watch the games in peace. I am not complaining, I am just saying that I don't want my phone to keep beeping all the time during my game only to tell me that an armchair expert just made a comment about a yellow card. 

Enjoy the World Cup my awesome Facebook friends!

Incidental Expenses Are So Heavy..

Just this morning I was telling my best friend about how I do not know what I spend my money on, and we both agreed that it is almost certainly impossible to save money, however hard(ly?) we try. He asked me if I bought something new, and I said no, which is true. I have not bought a single interesting gizmo in the last so many months.

After talking to him and a few cups of chai later, something made me go to Amazon's website. Since I was already there I decided to look for some cool electronics stuff. Since I now have an iPod, I decided to look for docking stations for it, convincing myself that I really need one just because they can so conveniently connect the iPod to my stereo, play music and charge it at the same time. I did like one, and almost decided to buy it when my eyes managed to spot one of those ultra cool Streamiums that I had always wanted but could not really get it because they are so expensive. Anyway, I forgot about the dock and started exploring the Streamiums. Philips launched a really cool Streamium last december called the NP2900/37, which I fell totally in love with. The biggest advantage of that player is that I can log in to my Rhapsody account through it and play songs  - without the computer. It only needs an Internet connection - wired or wireless. It can also wirelessly connect to the computer and play songs from the hard drive. And oh yeah, it has Internet radio, which means that I can possibly listen to a gazillion Internet radio stations from around the world. I almost decided to buy it, but something kept stopping me. Then I did a feasibility study. 

I already have a Philips micro system that connects to my computer and plays music that exists on my hard drive. If my computer is turned on then I can access any music website that exists on the Internet and play music, including Rhapsody, last.fm, and Pandora to name a few. If I want Internet radio, I can always use Winamp or go to any other random website that has Internet radio stations. The only disadvantage, if at all it is one, is that there is a USB cable dangling between my computer and the stereo, whereas with the new Streamium it would all be done wirelessly. So, after around 10 hours of thinking and debating, I decided not to spend $230 on something that would really not add value to my experience. Oh, and I decided not to spend $140 on the dock also. I will continue to use the RCA cable that I have to connect my iPod to the stereo, for which I paid $3 around a year ago.

But you know what I really want? A vacuum cleaner. Seriously, I want one really bad. The one I have is really crappy and just doesn't do anything. For me, vacuuming with that vacuum cleaner means literally (hand) picking stuff from the floor and breaking my back. 

But again, something always stops me. I feel that I just should not spend too much on a vacuum cleaner.

I know I am wrong.

And of course like I always say, I know how good my bad luck is. While Amazoning today my computer's power adaptor died, and my computer's got like 50 minutes of power left in it. Now I will really really have to buy a power adaptor. This is something I cannot avoid. The adaptor had died two years ago also, and I had paid 90 bucks back then to get a new one. 

Oh fudge.

Are You Serious?

I am slightly irritated right since morning. I spoke to my mom this morning and what she told me came as a total shock. She wants me to get married. It was one of those "enough already" talks. Suddenly. My mom thinks this is the right time to get married. I asked what happened to the deal that we had about me not getting married for 2 years (one year is gone, btw). She said we would have to start looking now - it is a tedious process apparently. I told my sister about my chat with mom, and she also seconds mom's sentiment. She wants to talk to me in detail about all this.

So now I have no support whatsoever. I used to look at my single friends and kind of sympathised with them when they said that their parents are pressuring them to get married. I am one of them now I guess. Well, my parents are not really pressuring me, but it might just start - you never know.

Mom also said that I should reduce/quit smoking and drinking if I haven't already. I said I have quit smoking. She said she was glad I said that. She also told me that I should change my lifestyle and that I should be more accomodating and all that.

Man, it's a very strange and awkward feeling. My life would totally change if I get married. I cannot see myself doing things that I normally do, with another person. It's so weird.

My brain has not been functioning since morning. I have been thinking about this. Oh God!

Don't Do It Again..Please

Confession.

I really hate it when people say "Welcome to the club". To be more specific - whenever I do/ buy something I tell people about it. If those people have already done/ bought it they say " welcome to the club". They usually have a smile on their face that tries to convey a certain message which goes something like, "hey, you know what, you did what I had done a long time ago, and your life would have been totally incomplete if you hadn't done what you just did."

I don't care about the message being conveyed, but the phrase annoys me - annoys me so much that I almost make an ugly face when somebody says it. In my mind I say WTF? to myself, but keep quiet. No I don't keep quiet. For some strange reason I say "thank you" to the other person (WTF, right?). And then I smile. I don't let the annoyance brewing inside me show on my face. I just decide not to offend the other person.

If you really want to use that phrase on me, use it when I really join a club that you are already a member of. Please don't otherwise. Please.

I hate it.

Another phrase that totally annoys me is "believe you me". I go "WTF?" every time someone says it. It doesn't make sense at all. If someone asks my name, do you think I would say "My is name Venkat"? I am sure you said no to that.

So all you nice people out there - if your friend does/ buys something that you already have - don't annoy them. Don't try to welcome them to a non existent club that only you are a member of. Say "Oh how nice!" or "Cool!" or "Attboy/girl" instead.

Thank you.

Spare Me Some Rock & Roll?

For some strange reason I felt like listening to Led Zeppelin today. I logged in to Rhapsody and searched for Led Zep, only to find out that most of their albums (and songs) are for sale only. You cannot listen to individual songs. I was mad. I wondered if I was getting the most of my subscription.

Anyway, I was already in the mood to listen to classic rock. I decided to listen to AC/DC. Searched for them too, only to find out that most of their albums are not on Rhapsody at all. I did find a cover of "You shook me all night long" by an unknown artist, and when I played it, I freaked. It was instrumental, and the entire song was played on a violin. I mean it was kind of cool to listen to that song, but I really wanted the classic heavy guitar riffs and Brian Johnson shreiking his lungs out. I half heartedly decided to switch to Aerosmith. I heard a live version of "Walk This Way", but without Run DMC. The annoying part was that the song ended with the opening lines of Aersmith's version of "Hey Jude" by The Beatles which went - "Hey Jude, lend me a penny...". WTF.

I was dissapointed. I was so in the mood to listen to classic rock but wasn't getting what I wanted. I was in the head banging mood, but somehow wasn't getting the head banging element. I felt very nervous and anxious. I felt like how when you are jerking off and you are about to reach the point of no return and the doorbell rings. You almost had it, but you never really got it.

I switched to Pearl Jam, but that did not satisfy me either. I finally gave up and decided to give Fleet Foxes a chance..

..and I am loving it.

Supply Chain Gone Wrong Or Just Indifference?

In grad school we read so many case studies and articles about how amazing and powerful Wal-mart's supply chain is, with the real cool satellite links and sophisticated tracking systems and what not. I knew for a fact that the case studies were fairly accurate not because I never found anything missing in a Wal-Mart store, but because I always saw so many Wal-Mart semis on city roads and highways. Of course, there are so many of those always parked in the unloading zone of every store.

But lately, I have seen that they don't have stuff available - stuff that I really want. Last week, whenever I went to the Wal-Mart in my town to get green chillies, they didn't have it. I went there around 3 times. They didn't have it. I once went to the store in the morning to get my breakfast, and the presence of those freshly sprinkled peppers made me smile. I thought to myself that I would buy them on my way back home in the evening. I went to the store in the evening - they didn't have it! )

I wanted ginger yesterday (dry cough sucks!). I went to the store and did not find it. I even asked an associate, and she pointed me to a certain area and said that I would find ginger there. I told her that I have already looked there.

"Then we don't have it".

Seriously?

For two weeks I have been trying to get wheat tortillas at Wal-Mart. I just cannot find them. They have all kinds of tortillas - tomato basil, spinach, four flour, and what not. But wheat - no sir.

Whenever I don't find anything in a Wal-Mart store, I think of the articles I read in school, and then I go - "No, this can't be really happening". But the only problem is that it really is. Are the satellites hibernating? Is the tracking system malfunctioning? Or am I just over reacting to the absence of veggies in the store?

If I go tell one of them authors from HBR or Business Week or whatever about my experiences, would they believe me? I am sure I will be a tiny little dot on the graph far far away from the others, and they would outlie me. Perhaps, they would not even believe me in the first place.

But it's just sad to see things not available in my favorite store.

*sigh*

Snow Snow Go Away...

It has started getting colder - already. I don't like it, I just don't like it. I mean I like what it is like right now - slightly chilly, cloudy and really really nice. I may want the weather to be like this forever, but what I don't like is the fact that the niceness would make way for hideousness in the coming months. Last winter was the worst I have ever seen, and the fact that it took so long to go away added to my misery. I dread the sight of snow and ice everywhere, and wind literally slapping my face while I walk on ice, trying my best not to land on my buttocks.

I hope the winter this year is nicer than last year.

I hope there is less snow.

I hope I get to see a tree somewhere with leaves on it.

I hope I don't start smoking again.

I am listening to Sugarcult as I write this post. I think I like them.

Missed Connections?

Lance Armstrong was in town, and I did not know. That was last month. He was in town to promote RAGBRAI. Apparently he does that every year. I got to know about it when I (over)heard two girls talking about it. I was in the mall buying birthday gifts for myself. I asked the girls if he would be in town the next day. They said they weren't sure.

Maybe I will get a chance to see him next year.

Totally missed Lollapalooza, and I hate myself for it. I had to miss it last year because I had an exam. I had to miss it this year because I had to move into my new apartment. Hate it!

So basically I missed NIN and Radiohead. Fuck.

NIN came to Minneapolis too. Couldn't go because of the same reason - moving.

:-(

Just One More Time Please...

Okay, Last.fm won't let me play full Radiohead songs anymore because I have probably finished my quota of free plays already...daaaaaang it!!! I hate it when that happens.

Last.fm is the source of my music at work these days.

I was actually trying to avoid a Rhapsody subscription because I thought I could stick to last.fm forever because it is so nice and it always lets me play full tracks for free and all that . Well, it is nice, but I just got kicked in the ass by last.fm..I am revisiting Radiohead these days and last.fm was the only place where I could listen to all there albums for free. I will probably have to bring my own MP3s from home.

I may not get a Rhapsody subscription after all because I got cable & Internet for my new apartment today and guess what, I will be shelling out 60 bucks every month for both. Well, that one came out of nowhere, but I am supposed to get some really good channels in digital, so that should be fun.

I Never Understood, The Frequency...

The kitten was not starred.

I just had the most terrible, sucky, fucky, pissy weekend of my life.

I have almost recovered, but still cannot believe that all that shit happened to me.

I am hungry. I will cook something and eat it while watching Darjeeling Limited (thanks to Netflix). If I get time tonight, I'll write about my wretched weekend. If I don't, I'll write about it in the coming few days.

Learning To Fly

BEFORE YOU READ: This is perhaps the longest post i have ever written. Please be patient :).

I always think about blogging about my "flying" experiences - what I go through/observe/experience when I take a flight and go somewhere. But thanks to procrastrination and ennui, I never write anything about them because usually there is so much to write. Just the thought of writing a lot tires me, and eventually the idea of sharing my amazing experiences, if you will, is abandoned - shamelessly.

But this time is different. I am determined to write about my trip last week to Niagara Falls. I have already started this post, and hope to finish it. This post may look like a chapter from a fiction novel simply because it's going to be so long. So my dear readers, please read this with a soda and popcorn in your hands. I am not promising entertainment, but I have observed that munching something while reading usually makes the process a lot less painful and a lot more entertaining.

My mom's friend had come to Baltimore to visit my sister, and since she was on the east coast, she thought she could fulfill her lifelong dream of going to see the Niagara Falls. My sister volunteered to take here there. She asked me to join them too, which I did. I flew from Des Moines to Baltimore last thursday. From there, we were to drive all the way to the falls and back.

Andrew, like always, was nice and kind enough to give me a ride to the Des Moines airport.

I checked in my bag, and moved towards security to find out that within the next few minutes, I would experience the most fun security check in my life, ever. The TSA guards were joking with me and each other, and they all smiled, which of course, is very unusual. I must say that it was perhaps the most laidback security check I have ever witnessed in this country. I remember the security check at the Bloomington airport being stricter than this.

Anyway, there was still like an hour left to board, and I was hungry too, so I grabbed a southwest chicken sandwich. Now, whenever I travel, I tend to overstuff myself with food. This time was no exception either. The sandwich actually was pretty big. But something inside me made me think that just that would not be enough. So I bought fries. And soda. I sat down, eating my stuff and reading "Grab On To Me Tightly As If I Knew The Way" which I had borrowed from the library just the previous day. Within a few minutes, I knew that the fries was a big mistake. But I usually don't waste food, so I kept munching away to glory.

The aircraft that was to take us from Des Moines to Chicago was one of the smaller ones - narrow and pointed, which is good enough to be a private jet but bad enough to carry like 50-60 passengers. The flight took off on time. I was still reading my book, and by the 20th page I knew what to expect in the coming 200 or so pages - utter American teenage nonsense. I dozed off, without even bothering to get my free soda and pretzels.

I woke up just in time. The plane was to land in the next 20 minutes or so. I was glad I slept because usually I cannot. The plane landed and I made my way to the gate from where I was to catch my flight to Baltimore. When I got inside the aircraft, I opened my nonsensical book and started reading it again, just for the heck of it. Within a few minutes a desi guy came and sat next to me. I could tell that he was really nice - more so because he tried to start a conversation with me which went something like this:

Guy: Hi!

Me: Hello there!

Guy: How are you?

Me: Good, how are you?

Guy: Very good, thanks.

Then, like an ass, I continued to read my book. I knew the guy wanted to chit-chat, but I simply ignored him.

I had suddenly turned anti-social.

To be honest, I am usually nice to other people. Really nice. But this time around I don't know what happened. I totally snubbed him. I didn't like it, but I think I was tired, and I was reading that Godforsaken book. I guess I didn't want to be disturbed.

About 40 minutes before landing, the pilot announced that a tornado was following us from North Carolina, and that hopefully we would be able to beat it to avoid the excessive rain that a stupid tornado brings. That is when the guy started looking out of the window and said something about the weather. I replied back, but since I was in my anti-social mode, I said something that was perhaps not interesting enough to maintain the longevity of our conversation. The guy then started talking to the lady on his right, and I overheard him saying that he was coming from Oregon. That is when I did a 360 and turned totally friendly and nice. I told him how I always wanted to go see Oregon, and how the air tickets are always so expensive (the last time I checked, it was $600 for the memorial day weekend :(( ). The lady, who was coming from Wisconsin, told me that I should definitely go to Oregon, and that it is very very beautiful. She also told me that I should drive on highway 101 to enjoy my Oregon experience to the fullest. I said I will.

The three of us started talking non stop, and after a while I got to know that the guy was originally from Pakistan, now a Canadian citizen (based in Toronto), and currently living in Baltimore with his family.

I told them I was from India.

The flight landed on time, but we were a little late in beating the tornado. Well, the tornado did not come to the Baltimore area, but it was raining like crazy out there because of which our luggage were not taken out of the aircraft for like 45 minutes. When I finally got my bag I got out of the airport and got in my sister's car. Our aunt had also come. I said namaste to her. Our chit-chat started and we drove away.

I was to come back to Des Moines last sunday, and my flight was at 7:30 in the evening. Our aunt was also going to Kentucky that very day. Her flight was in the morning, though. We took her to the airport, and I went in with her to help her check in.

That is when I got to know about a crazy Southwest concept.

Apparently, the last 15 boarding passes are not given at the check in counter - they are given at the gate. So basically, if you are late, you have to run to the gate. If somebody else gets there before you do, then you can kiss your flight good bye - doesn't matter if you have a confirmed ticket or not.

We were in a similar situation. My aunt did not get her boaarding pass. The lady at the check in counter asked me to go with her, in case my aunt had communication problems. She gave me a pass that would let me go through security without a boarding pass. We both went through security and reached the gate. Apparently, there was no else to claim one of the last 15 passes, so we were safe. The guy gave my aunt her boarding pass that she deserved. We waited for a little while. When boarding started, I touched her feet, bid her goodbye, and came out of the airport.

Then my sister and I went shopping.

When we came back at around 5:00 PM, I decided to check the status of my flight. Usually, I don't do it. In fact, I have never checked my flight status the day I am suppposed to catch it. I just show up at the airport assuming that the flight would be on time.

But for some odd reason, I checked the status online. This time. And this is what I saw:

Flight 327: Baltimore to Chicago

Status: Cancelled

Reason: -

I have experienced many delayed flights in my life. But cancelled? What in the world is that?

I could not believe it. Who would have thought that it would ever happen to me? Bad things happen to other people, don't they?

But here I was - facing the bitter truth. I was victimized. I felt so molested. Suddenly the world seemed very unfair, and I was still in shock.

I called customer care. I spoke to Richard about my situation. Now obviously Richard was sitting in India, but I did not have the time and energy to chit-chat about that. He told me that there is a flight from Dulles airport in Virginia at 7:41, and that I should try to catch it.

Current time : 5:15.

Time it takes to reach there: 1:30 hours.

We immediately left. My sister decided to speed (she loves it) , but as luck would have it, it started to rain. And then there was a traffic jam. And then I called customer care again, and spoke to Archie. I told her that I am stuck and that I might not be able to make it. She was very nice and patient. She said no problem, and put me on the next flight from Dulles -at 6:00 AM next day, on standby that is. Since we were stuck already, I decided to chat with her informally. I asked her if she was in Delhi. She said she was. I told her that I was from Delhi too. I then asked her her real name. She said Aarti. I then asked her where she lived. She said South Ex. She then said that it is always a pleasure to talk to Indian customers. I said thank you. I also told her that she was very kind and helpful.

We reached Dulles at 7:20. I went to United's check in counter where I met another very very nice lady. I explained my situation to her, and she did whatever she could to help me out. Apparently, it was too late to board the aircraft, but she gave me a pass that would let me pass through security. I thanked her and told her that she was the best. Another lady standing next to her said, "Yes, she is". We all laughed.

Then I ran.

The guy at security looked at the time on my boarding pass, then looked at me, smiled, and said sarcastically, "You are a little too early for your flight". I said I know. I made it through security, ran towards the gate only to find out that boarding was over and that they had shut the gate. The aircraft was still there - it had not taken off. But I could not board it.

That was the perfect time to use my favorite quote coined by yours truly - "I know how good my bad luck is".

I was to take the 6AM flight now. I told my sister to go back home, and that I would spend the night at the airport.

I was hungry. I went to a store where they had chawal chole! It was frozen, but the Japanese lady behind the counter offered to heat it up for me. I then went to another store to buy chips where the desi owner was busy flirting with a desi customer girl. He looked at me and asked his sidekick/flunky to see what I wanted.

I bought the chips and found a spot where I could charge my phone. Thank God I had my phone charger in my back pack. I sat on the floor and ate my food.

After a "heavy" meal, i decided to sleep. I lay down on the floor, with my back pack doubling up as my pillow. I tried to sleep, but the floor was so dang cold, that I was almost shivering. I decided to get the security check done so that I could sleep on one of those longer seats at the gate. I went to security only to be told that I should come back after midnight. It was 10:20.

I then went to Arrivals. Walked around and looked around. There were many flights coming in - both domestic and international. I loitered around for some time, then went to Departures to try to sleep again.

I did.

Try, that is.

Around 1:00 I got my security check done. I was actually the only one, so there was no rush. I asked one of the TSA guys about a good place to take a nap. The guy was very nice (Peurto Rican). He told me that I should go to Terminal D instead of C because D is much more warmer :). I thanked him and started walking towards D. Luckily my flight was from D too, so that kind of made me smile.

I reached my gate, found a long seat, and slept. For around 3 hours. I am pretty sure I snored.

When I got up at around 4:30, I was surprised to see so many people for a 6 o' clock flight. There was another Indian guy. He told me that he was in a similar situation - missed his flight the previous night and all that jazz. We spoke for a while and then boarded the same flight.

Awesome flight. Slept throughout.

In the flight to Des Moines, read around 80 pages of that idiotic book again.

And of course, Andrew was at the airport to receive me. We took my luggage, went to eat breakfast at Perkins (hadn't had American breakfast in a while :)) which was awesome, and then reported to work.

The Namesake?

Today I decided to watch The Namesake. Dissapointed.

It's ironic how while reading the book I thought that Jhumpa Lahiri had paid too much attention to detail - to the extent that it annoyed me. But the movie is just the opposite. No detail at all. Everything in the movie happened so abruptly - so abruptly that it annoyed me.

And the facts - completely twisted.

- To start with, Ashoke smokes in the movie. Now, in the book, Ashoke was apparently the only bengali guy in the US who did not smoke.

- When Ashoke goes to meet Ashima at her house, her parents tell his parents that her best subject is English. Then her dad asks her to to recite something, and she recites"Daffodils" by William Wordsworth. As far as I know, that never happened in the book.

- In the movie, Ashoke is doing his PhD in fiber optics in New York, but the book mentions that he was in Cambridge. Surprise Surprise!

- The movie completely ignores Gogol's ceremony in which he is asked to grab either a pen, a dollar bill, or something else (can't recall what). I thought the scene was funny. Instead, they show Sonia's ceremony.

- Gogol's college girlfriend Ruth does not appear in the movie at all.

- The Ganguli family goes to India for 3 months after he graduates from high school. In the book, they went to India when he was still in 10th grade.

- In the movie, Gogol meets Moushumi after his high school graduation. In the book, he met her when he was 6.

- Which reminds me, On the day he graduates Gogol is shown smoking weed with his friends with a tassle wrapped around it. First - Not mentioned anywhere in the book. Second - utterly gross.

- Ashoke barges into Gogol's room when he is headbanging and air guitaring to Pearl Jam's "Once". In the book, he was listening to The Beatles.

- In the movie, Gogol discusses his plans of changing his name with everyone in the family at the dinner/lunch table. Ashoke just says "everything is possible in America" and goes away to smoke. The book, as a matter of fact, had several pages dedicated to this situation - "in detail".

This is when I couldn't take it anymore and decided not to watch the rest of it. Those of you who have not seen the movie - don't. Read the book instead. It is much more engrossing and painful - and will bring tears to your eyes.

Flash To The Power of n

This morning I woke up to my ridiculously hideous fire alarm like sounding phone alarm. At first I could not understand the situation simply because I am used to getting up to a nicer sounding radio clock alarm that goes off four minutes earlier. I did get up to switch it off but instantly got lost trying to determine what might have gone wrong with my radio clock alarms (ya, two of 'em). I looked at one of the alarm clock and saw the digits flashing. That is when I realized that there was a power outage last night, and that all the clocks have been reset. I looked at the other clock - same thing. I said "what the hell" to myself and continued with the daily painful, forgetful act of getting ready to go to work.

I came back in the evening, watched some TV and came in to my bedroom to switch on my computer. That is when I saw those flashing digits on my radio clock again that reminded me of the entire "getting up to the weirdest alarm sound" encounter. I was lazy enough not to set the time on both the clocks and that is the reason why I am so annoyed right now. One clock is almost in front of me, just a little to the left. Now them flashing numbers are hurting my eyes. They are not directly in my line of vision, but I can still see them do the new age phoenix repeatedly from the corner of my left eye. The non stop flashing is making me think of an SOS call of a sinking ship going horribly wrong.

The situation I am in right now is worse than the one in which you are with a girl who seeks constant attention. I want to get rid of it but I can't , because it's happening right in front of me. I can make it stop but I won't because I am too lazy. It's like I know I am getting fatter by the day but I still won't go exercise (figuratively speaking, okay?). It's like I know I am damn hungry but still won't eat at my relative's house because I am shy (figuratively speaking, okay?).

laziness has become a way of life. Sometimes I wonder if my children would be so lazy too.

Help me God.

Hair Cut

I have not had a hair cut in 3 months. I am trying to grow my hair, and I really want to see how much more can my hair make people scream in disgust and agony. I look shabby already, and to be honest, I really don't know how to take care of my hair. I do use shampoo and conditioner fairly regularly, but that's it. I don't know any other magic trick that would make me look like Zoolander.

I usually get a haircut every month, or perhaps one and a half months.

Today, however, I thought that it's really not such a good idea, and decided to get a hair cut. I have a job now, and I really cannot afford to look like a hippy - my officemates would start despising me. So I bathed, shaved, dressed up and got out of my apartment. It was a little cloudy and windy, but nice overall. I reached Main Street where I checked out six different salons, one by one.. - all fudging closed! Can you believe it? Not even one was open. All closed! Now the people that run those salons should realize that their are some businesses (like theirs) that thrive only or mostly on the weekends. So those involved in such businesses cannot afford to shut down on saturdays and sundays. That's utter foolishness. If they were cutting hair for free then it would have been a completely different issue. But no, they charge you 12 - 15 bucks, and they want you to go to them at their convenience - not yours.

How in the world is that supposed to make life comfortable (mine, not theirs)?

The Missing Piece

My worst nightmare has come true.

I could not finish a puzzle a few days ago because there was a piece missing in the puzzle set.

See the missing piece?

This is what I have dreaded all my life. For some reason whenever I bought a jigsaw puzzle I got the feeling that it would have a piece missing. For so many years, however, this never happened, and my fear was overpowered by the manufacturer's superb quality checks.

But it happened. Two days ago, and now my fear has resurfaced. I will never be able to finish a jigsaw puzzle with full confidence. There will always be an element of suspense. There will always be tension.

The only soultion that comes to my mind is to count the number of pieces in the puzzle first, and if there are any pieces missing, repack the puzzle, send it back to the manufacturer and ask for a refund. But what if I am about to solve a one thousand piece puzzle? Is counting the number of pieces before starting to solve the puzzle really feasible? I don't think so. What if while counting I get bitten by an ant on the floor? I will lose count of all the pieces and will have to start all over again. So I guess I should just keep my finger crossed and hope for the best everytime.

Misery Loves Company

I spoke with a good friend after so many days. He is under a lot of pressure these days - he has his thesis proposal due and has to take his PhD qualifying exam by the end of spring. Well, he was just a little frustrated, and was wondering as to why life becomes more complicated and stressful with time. He says that it should be just the opposite. With education and experience, life should be a lot more nicer, easier, comfortable, and a lot less painful. But that is not the case. I did not disagree with him because each day brings a different kind of trauma. Sometimes I feel that every time I am involved in something, I am being tested. Everything is a challenge, and the misery that comes with those challenges just does not stop!

So, my childhood dream (well, it's not just mine) of having a huge mansion and an infinite number of cars (like all the sheikhs have) and an endless supply of money - would it ever come true? What about a random lawyer calling me up and telling me that a distant uncle or aunt just died and left me tons and tons of money - would that ever happen? Will I ever win a lottery? Will I marry the daughter of a business tycoon who would request me to take care of his business because it's becoming a little too much for him to handle or that he has seen it all and now wants to go on top of a mountain to medidate?

Well, all these questions have one common answer ---- NO.

My past experiences say that I will always have to slog like a donkey. I will always be the average Joe. I will spend my entire life dealing with family issues, and my future wife would also be from a middle class family, and we would both work our entire lives to make ends meet, to give our children good education, and blah blah blah.

I know how good my bad luck is. I rest my case, your honor.

Computer???Noooooooo........

The problem with switching on your computer is that it makes you stick to it forever. You hardly ever turn it off. You glue yourself to it. You would not have anything to do, but still you would sit in front of it, pretending to be busy doing something. If you are watching TV, you can atleast turn it off instantly and walk away. But your computer puts a spell on you - always. Have you ever turned on your computer, checked emails, and then turned it back off instantly? I am sure you have not.

Disappointed

Ubisoft has disappointed me - big time. After finishing Splinter Cell Essentials in 3 days, I started wondering about the possible reasons why this game's length was so short. First of all, most of the levels in this game were taken from previous Splinter Cell episodes. So it was more like replaying "Splinter Cell: Stealth Action Redefined", "Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow" and Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory". Since the story line of Essentials involves Sam being framed for killing Lambert, there were new levels too in order to justify Lambert's murder.

But as I said before, I am complaining about the length of the game. Maybe the game was indeed short, or I have mastered the art of manoeuvring Sam with ease. Well, I don't know.

Now Playing - Need For Speed: Carbon

I succumbed to temptation.

I have always been an anti - Sony guy. I strongly feel that their products are super inferior, not really great, and overrated to the power of n. When it comes to audio equipment, I have always relied on Philips simply because of the amazing quality and crispness offered by its products. In case of video games, I never considered the PS2 as an option, and I bought the XBox instead. Portable gaming systems - same thing. I bought the GameBoy advance long time back. But..

The GBA is extinct now. I wanted to buy the NintendoDS, but the only thing that always stopped me was the variety of games offered by Nintendo. I have grown up now, and Mario and Zelda do not fascinate me anymore. I don't even look at games like Pokemon and Cars. Nintendo's catalogue is more suitable for children 10 and below. Of course, they have some good games like NFS and Splinter Cell, but unfortunately, the graphics are not that good (NFS Underground2 looks so silly on a GBA).

A secret - I have always been fascinated by the Sony PSP. I really like the super huge screen, and its ability to display amazing "console like" graphics takes my breath away. I recently got to know that you can access the Internet on it too. Plus its ability to play music and movies is a big big bonus. UMDs are expensive, but honestly, used ones are not. However, my policy of not buying anything Sony made me ignore it for so long.

I could not take it any longer, though. I kept on thinking about the PSP. I realized what a wonderful piece of machine it is, and how it can help me fulfill my dream of playing "realistic" viedo games 24 X 7. I finally said fuck it, and bought the PSP yesterday. Now I am desperately waiting for it to arrive.

Just so you know, I am still against other Sony equipment.